Do You Speak My Language?

There's a book entitled The Five Love Languages that I read before. It says the success of a relationship is based on knowing how to speak your partner's love language, and vice-versa. It came with a little quiz on how to determine your love language (because "knowing is half the battle"), and sadly, I've forgotten mine already. But that's really not the point of this. Right now, I don't have to know my language because no one has to learn how to speak it anyway.

Yesterday, one of the nicest guys I know got married. Not quite at gunpoint, but there have been certain catalysts. Ok, just one catalyst, which I won't mention no matter how cryptic this blog is anyway. Are you pregnant with curiousity already?

When I found out he was getting married, I ranted to C to knock some sense into him. Ha. As if they knew each other.

C, another one of my most favoritest (sic) people in the whole wide world, really got married at gunpoint. And now that his 3(?)-year marriage (I wasn't invited so I have an excuse not to remember the date) is falling apart, I thought he'd be the best person to impart some wisdom to T. But it never happened and T got married yesterday and I just found out today that C's gunning for an annulment.

And since we're speaking along the lines of marriage anyway, I received an email from a friend today who admitted she's looking into marrying her boyfriend of 4 months so she can continue to reside in the country she's currently in.

I haven't responded to her yet (I have an excuse! I'm busy!) but this is what I want to tell her:

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Dear L,

I may not know much about money, or love, and I can't say I have a lot of both either, but I do know that getting into a marriage of convenience should not even be on your list of options!!! Come home immediately so I can screw your head on right!

Love,
Me
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Love is such a complicated, complicated thing, and marriage even more so because it combines love (a very, very complicated thing) and the law (also a very, very complicated thing)!

And if you agree with what's written here and you DO speak my love language, stay away from me. Stay very far away!